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Well my titles had been getting a bit unoriginal, but just in case steph and wilson were forgetting, Hanna, is NOT my name! NER :P!
Ah well my computer was being a crappy little stubborn bugger last night and decided not to work so that just sucked, then the lady down the road rang about me feeding her horses when she goes away on the weekend and talked to me for 2 hours after that... Yay!

Ah so only hospitality assignment and ancient test left.. but today is meant to be 40something degrees which just stinks!!! ITS TOO HOT!!!! How are people meant to survive this sort of heat?? I hate the heat.. like really really hate it.. even when it gets to about 26 I reckon it's too hot... I like the cooooollldddd I want to be coooooooooooooooooold, forever! But you know I always seem to get my anti-wish.. Like if I ever say "I hope that never happens to me" it does.. It's really annoying

Anyway I believe I am meant to be going to school...Tata

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Tehe well Wilson is writing a story, its at middleearthacademy.blogspot.com (i think) so yeahhh go to it! lol and i cant be bothered with hyperlinks so unless this does it by itself youre just gunna have to copy and paste!!
Um what happened today? The AGM, and the presentation at pony club. My mum does the trophies and some bits were a bit screwed up but oh well, never mind... anyways this arvo I came home and worked out a system for her on the computer which (I think) will work much better.. Also apparently I am allowed to help co-ordinate the ODE, which will be GREAT!! Yay!!! Lol i really wanted to, and now I can! I hope this means I get to go to commitee meetings too, cause I have a lot of points of view, which unfortunately don't get passed on much because mum forgets all the time!
Tehehe I also get to be an instructor there next year, which will be even more fun than organizing!
Haha I love my dad not being here, its fantasterastic.. ahh so this is what they call "having a weight lifted from your shoulders" eh? tehehe anyways i should go finish my proposal (only 50 or so words to go!)
ciao

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Well, I went to Millie's thingo last night.. fun... lalala ok im bored of that topic now..
I ate at sarahs work today.. fun.. lalala ok im bored of that topic now..
I went Christmas shopping (for the secret santa thing).. cool. I found what I wanted to find..fun.. lalala ok im bored of that topic now..
My dad is temporarily gone to "sort things out"...fun.. lalala ok im bored of that topic now..
I might be going to italy next year instead of egypt cause i cant afford to get to egypt...fun.. lalala ok im bored of that topic now..
ive almost finished my ext 2 proposal...fun.. lalala ok im bored of that topic now..
i found out what a hospo journal is, and i was right, but i wouldnt have a clue where to find one...fun.. lalala ok im bored of that topic now..
this is getting really repetitive...fun.. lalala ok im bored of that topic now..
im gunna go..fun.. lalala ok im bored of that topic now..
ciao

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Well news eh? I don't really have any.. I got my maths mark back, 46/60... hmm it's alright, the problem is my expectations are a fair bit higher than they were before (now that I actually understand maths) so yeahh.. but apparently not many people did too well.. Arggg and I thought I did pretty well in it too....

Anyways today was pretty sucky.. Yesterday I had my english speech (which no doubt was crap too) and then worked, which was alright.. Actually no, it was good, I'm just in a bit of a sucky mood again.. I wrote another story thing, cause I had already written The Quest For the Holy Glory (Cause the grail had been found) so this time I wrote The Quest For Truth, it was interesting, because I wrote it all in second person, which I found out is very difficult to do, it's so unnatural. It's a bit depressing though, then we started reading Brave New World, which is also fairly depressing.... Then thinking about our maths teacher abandoning us (very depressing) and yes I'm just in an overall sucky mood, to make matters worse I feel sick and just had the stupid stitches outa my toe... So BOOHOOO HHOOOO woe is me! Lol

Hmm sooo what else? Oh yes, Millie's farewell party is tonight, which should be good (yes I'm going Steph, breathe).. Umm I dunnoooo wait a while and I might think of something, only I don't really have a while and I want to type up these stories.

Barp well I had best be off tata

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Hmm now I can guess the reaction of the title "oh know she is going to complain about her parents for 2000 years until i am dying of boredom and want to hit her over the head with a brick (or whichever comes first)" Funnily enough, although I feel I have a right to complain, it is too teenagerish and annoying and I hate when people do that and lie about stuff and exaggerate their lying to the point where you are ready for the parents to pull a zip on the top of their heads and step out as aliens, because hey that is more likely than what is going on in this exaggeration of a lie... NO I am actually going to say how PROUD i am of my mum (and because I don't want to get into annoyances I won't mention the other half of this argument)..

This is the reason for me not being at school yesterday.. The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.. No exaggerations included (they come extra for just $29.95 and a freight cost of $7.50 to customers outside Australia.. just kidding!!!).. Anyways I'll stop the creative genius and get on with my story, it is a nice juicy one, so I'm sure people will want to read it.
Anyway I woke up at 7am yesterday morning (which is funny, cause my alarm was meant to go off at 6:30).. My alarm hadn't gone off and it took me a moment to realize WHY i had woken up, nothing except my alarm has ever managed that difficult feat before... then i realized there was a banging on the stairs.. I immediately assumed my dad because he is incapable of walking quietly.. Then I heard some yelling "As if I didn't know! You are a male whore!" etc etc etc and realized that was my mum (not the TV as I originally assumed.. sorry back on track) and they had a nice big argument until my dad decided to leave for work.. ANYWAYS meanwhile i really needed to pee, but the bathroom is outside my room (i.e not an ensuite) so i just waited until mum went outside to feed my horse (because I still couldn't walk too well) then went to the bathroom and went back to bed and pretended I had slept through it all ... which wasn't too hard.. Anyway my mum came in and "woke me up" at 8:30 and i started to get ready for school, because I really didn't want to be there while she was in that sort of mood, it's not fun trust me.. but nnoooo i had to stay home which just sucked...

So that is my story of why I didn't come to school.. Anyway the reason I was proud of her is because for the first time in her life she actually stood up for herself instead of complaining to me! SO all I can say is GO MUM GO WHOOOOOOOOO!!! To tell the truth I have no idea why I just wrote that, I don't want some sort of sympathy, honestly I am happy for her, I don't really care that they are arguing (though it appears that I am meant to according to my research for extension 2.. oh god here comes the ice queen again! lol or not).. in fact I don't care at all as long as my mum doesnt leave or something and not take me with her.. in which case I will NOT be proud of her any more but instead quite angry..

Why did I write all of that? Maybe I should start again? No. I want to tell the truth, I'm sick of telling people that I just slept in and mum couldn't be bothered taking me, she could be bothered, she didn't want to.

Anyways I went to school today, which was good :D Actually school wasn't good, and being there wasn't good.. I'm not too sure what was good about it.. Just getting out of the house I suppose...

I just read Wilson's blog so I've been thinking about what she was saying (and I'm not going into the parent thing here because I've just said how proud i am of my mum and i don't want to complain about her right now)... so I was thinking about friends... and someone once gave me this thing saying how everyone at school was just a constant aquaintance, it's so true... I mean as much as I like the people I hang around, I don't know that... well what defines a friend? Cause I reckon I'll make the effort to keep in touch, but honestly am I going to have time? Am I going to even know them, not remember, but KNOW them? Do I know them now? Will it be one of those things where you always have to revert back to talking about the past because you have nothing in common any more, and sharing things that have happened bores you? I think so. Cause I have friends that I've said I'd stay in touch with, people who left in primary school, people who moved overseas, and as much as I try it's no use, they are different, I'm different...

I guess a good example is Olivia (in our grade for those of you who go to my school).. we used to be good friends, yeah i'd even say best friends (even though i HATE that term) but in year 7 i kind of switched groups and whatever.. so anyway I talked to her a couple of months ago, I wouldn't have a CLUE who she is.. I mean sure she's still Olivia, she still looks pretty much the same.. But I don't know her at all, I just have a feeling that everyone that I'm friends with now will be like that.. Another example is someone who moved overseas, again we were really good friends, and i still talk to her on msn, if you can call it talking, it gets to the how are you stage and we both have nothing to say, and we can try as hard as we want but there will never be a conversation there except about the past, and I don't like talking about the past! GRRR..

So really I think friends only exist for a certain amount of time, and after that you are constant aquaintances, but most people you meet are just constant aquaintances and will never be anything more... So there! Contradict me if you want, I don't care.

Anyways now I've had a bit of a rant and rave about some stuff.. I should finalize my english speech.. I'm quite proud of how long this is, considering I've only talked about two things! tehe I really am having an inspirational moment.. I can't seem to stop writing (if only i could turn that inspiration to the topic of imaginative journeys!)

CIAO!!!

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OK maybe I can't read tv guides, but wasn't the final Aussie Idol meant to finish at 9:30? not 10:30????? I only started watching at 9:25 thinking I'd just quickly find out who won for the sake of it, then it went on for bloody ten thousand years!!!!!!! SHISHE! Na good job Casey, that's so weird, she's around my age and she's already reached her goal (if it was her goal)... far out! I wish I could do that! haha no I don't, what would you spend the rest of your life doing? Is there any way up from there? and if there is what if you reach that by the time you are 20? Hmm I think if you did by the time you are 30 you would have to find a new goal, and try to reach that!

Speaking of reaching goals, my goal last night was to get to the top of the stairs without feeling like my foot was being cut with a million chef's knives, sadly it didn't happen, I had to crawl up the rest of the way, and same this morning, which is why I'm not at school, the stupid thing is still bleeding from me crawling down the stairs!!! damn it!!! its so annoying, I cant have a shower without a plastic bag over my foot, so I try it and fall over backwards and come close to cracking my head open on the wall.. geeezzz, why couldnt it have been my hand? sure I couldn't write, and typing would be hard, but it would be good practise writing with my right hand, and id at least be able to go to school! As it is we have to hire some crutches, then somehow try to get the stupid thing in a shoe without me passing out!

Sooo I have another day at home with my assignments and studying to keep me company! Tehe I just changed the colour of my font! Hmm what am I going to do about Christmas? I have to get that secret santa thing, and something for gendy plus something for her little bubbies... plus family, plus other friends, plus birthdays... GEEEZZZZZZ

Cool, I just read on the main bloggery page that someone got their book published off their blog,... I'd love to get a book published.. I always have these ideas for novels, which (i think) are really good ideas but I write the first chapter and get bored of writing and forget about them! I can only write short stories that last. Ooo actually I started writing a bit of a short story I came up with once, want to read the first bit? I know you do! It's sort of a kids story, but based on a play..

Mikey and Ben were the bravest kids in the school. They had defended their friends against many enemies, and even now were returning from their defeat of The Boy. The Boy was big and brave, but he had turned on his friends.
As Mikey and Ben were walking home, they saw a strange woman outside the cake shop, her hair was grey and wavy, her skin was pale. She was pale as the frost which sometimes covered the ground. Most of all, she was different.
"We know all the people in our town, but I've never seen her before" whispered Mikey.
"Why are you whispering Mikey?" Ben said, whispering more softly than Mikey.
"I'm not sure, let's get closer and hear what she is saying."
The pale woman was old, and she was talking to the owner of the cake shop. His name was Daniel, he was a kind and generous man, whom all the children adored. Finally Mikey and Ben could hear what the old woman was saying.
"Ah the new cake is beautiful, to be sure. Oh hello children, you look sweet! Are you walking home? I'm sure your mummies will have plenty of cookies for each of you at home!"When she saw Mikey glancing at the beautiful cake in the window she whispered
"and I'm sure one day you will have this beautiful cake too dear! Now run along home!"
Mikey looked at Ben, and they had a little chuckle together. However as they were walking away Mikey heard Daniel whisper to the woman "No, he won't have this cake, it is for my son, Mitch." Mikey was angry, he wanted the cake, he could almost taste it's sweet icing.Mitch won't have the cake, I will steal it from him if I have to... But how? I will ask my sister when I get home, she will think of a plan.Ben was happily talking about other things, and when they parted at the top of Ben's street, Mikey still hadn't told him about his plans. They waved a cheerful goodbye.

Ok so that's the beginning, unfortunately now that I've read it again it sounds crappy! Oh well I'll just keep going, and post bits on here when I have nothing else to say!

My extension 2 is coming along nicely, I looked up all this stuff about infidelity on Saturday, it's really interesting! Only I don't think I'm meant to talk about it on here somehow! Mind you talking about infidelity can't hurt now can it? There was a website written by someone who's fiance cheated on them, the URL is http://cheatinghusband.net, very interesting, and very good for my purposes.

I should REALLY finish my english speach, then I'm going to see how long it is, and spend the next two days fixing it until I think it's right! Yes true all my plans are for after I've finished it, but unfortunately that isn't happening as quickly as I'd like, there aren't that many parallels between my related text and Coleridge's poems, which just sucks!!! I'm off to do that now, I'll wml! Oh and remind me I have to write sarah an e-mail! OK bbs!

OK well I haven't done anything pretty much on my english assignment, which is just annoying me! I just can't get motivated.. The funny part was that I was reading my horoscope and it said that health would be an issue this week and that I wouldn't be at all motivated! I found that quite funny, cause I usually don't even bother reading it, but today I did and one of the ones I found was actually pretty right!

Anyways for my english assignment I got to reread the Hobbit, which is always fun anyway! Also I just watched Rugrats on TV to try and inspire me, it's interesting to note that they use an imaginative journey in just about every episode... other interesting thing to note is that I just said that I was trying to get it to inspire me.. I wonder if it also caused me to speculate and discover? Hahaha I make myself laugh! no just kidding it really wasn't funny at all! Anyone else confused about what in the world I am going on about yet? I have no clue, so unless you have some seriously high powered brain which specializes in wackoness I doubt that you understand me! Actually if you have that sort of brain I would love to meet you some time, it sounds intriguing.. maybe I can put it in my extension 2!!

Ooo half an hour and I have to start working on my english speech again! It's now 12:30... so it looks kind of grey outside doesn't it? yes it does! Ooops I sstill haven't written an e-mail to Sarah, so I will go write that now.. Because otherwise I "don't deserve to talk to her because I dont talk to her enough now" so ho diddle hum I should probably do that! Hahaha that is such a stupid thing to say, oh well some people are stupid... I meann.. they're great..:D

I don't think anyone actually reads this, I think wilson might, she mentioned it a while ago.. Oh well, I've also started making a website, for no real reason except to add some amusement into my life! Haha so don't visit it! lol Oh wait I forgot you can't, I haven't put the address on here! Mwahaha! tehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe wow that was a long and drawn out tehe! This is very odd, I just write whatever pops into my head so it doesn't make much sense (again)! Ok I'm really going to go write that e-mail now tata! I'll write more in another post if I write again! CIAO

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It's amazing how much you really move your toes. OK so the story goes:
I was washing my horse, and i had thongs on instead of my usual boots(very very stupid I know) so my horse goes and jumps on my foot... next thing I know there is blood pouring out of it (no exaggeration, we had the puddle to prove it) and i was screaming for mum who naturally couldn't hear me from the house... so i washed it with the hose i was washing my horse with and realized i had grazing on the top of my ankle and toes and a big hole in the bottom of my big toe and a nice deep hole connected to the other hole (which is where the blood was coming from)... so after much pain and agony (and a whole heap of bandages from my first aid kit in the stables) i got up to the house.. bla bla bla.. went to the doctors... now have two stitches in my toe and just came back from an xray (nothing is broken).. so happy happy joy joy, Im not riding this weekend now and my mum is still making me go to school on monday even though i cant walk and my foot looks like a balloon on the end of my leg.. YAY!

So that's my story... I'm incredibly bored... i told mum to buy me a magazine to read so now i have WHO! YAY just what i wanted lol.. I should be doing assignments but hey I'm a lazy ass and procrastinate a lot and this is (very) slightly more entertaining than assignments...

Oh I can put the lyrics to the song that I had stuck in my head yesterday.. except i can't be bothered so I'll just write the chorus... It's old and I'm not too sure who it's by:

Go on and close your eyes, imagine me there
shes got similar features with longer hair
and if that's what it takes, to get you through
go on and close your eyes it shouldn't bother you..

Do you know it? tehe! I like it!

Oooo I can hear some lunch noises, usually I'd go check...oh wait no need, it's here.. mmmmm food! Well on the way back from the xray, i saw brittany on the side of the road heading to the towers .. oh wait correction, she saw me, my mum saw her then pointed her out to me!

OK I'm actually going to try and do my english speech, only problem is my related text seems to have gone missing which is quite inconveniant! Maybe I'll do some maths study.. Yes maybe.. Ciao!

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Ah what to say... *bliss*.. Tehe well Adelaide itself isn't bliss, we found a fair few homeless people, and a guy who pretended to have a limp so he could scab money off us.. but the horse trials were bliss, and seeing as nobody cares that is as long as this post is going to go for... tata

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Well the tally for the moment on assignments and tests is:
Hospitality assignment
English one formal assignment and some essay for Wednesday
Maths test
Ancient assignment coming
Extension 2 English proposal
Legal assignment (have to hand in on Thurs cause wont be here monday)..
Um I think (and hope) that's all... Actually come to think of it, the only other subject I do is Extension 1, and we have homework for that... So school just SUCKS at the moment!!!!! GEEEZZZZZ Plus I have that stupid coffee school thing tomorrow, so I'll miss out on more work I have to catch up and just GRRRR.. lol it's funny that I'm actually not that stressed about all this, more angry than anything else!! Good thing I won't be riding much for the rest of this term (if I ride at all)..

Hm I got my hair streaked today, I think it looks good, especially cause they can always make it go straight, and I never can, no matter how long I spend blowdrying it etc. But I suppose that is how hairdressers get their jobs, I wonder if it is like the "eternal truth of hairdressing" which you can't learn until you are a qualified hairdresser... perhaps, I will ask them next time I am there..

Anyway I should be doing my assignments rather than being on this and talking to Megan about buying lollies for Adelaide! Tata!!!

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Lol or when it's mr hird lets not hail to the busdriver!! Haha oh well at least he didn't flip the thing on it's side, just ran it a little too close to a branch on one side, but that doesn't matter.. No harm done (at least not to the bus!)... I wonder what Hirdy was going to say before that boring man up the front rudely interrupted him!? Hm I've worked out that I don't like going on things when I'm with people I can't talk to without thinking.. You know like if you know somebody, or you talk to them heaps, it takes no effort to start a conversation, or continue one even while you're not concentrating... or maybe that's just me! I also have a problem at the moment with talking to people who have intelligent conversations cause of the concentration issues!

Hm what can be the song of the day today? Hummmmmm... I'm not sure, I have Chains stuck in my head for no reason at all.. I don't even think I've heard it today, so that's just odd...

I hate hearing about all the things you can do for Extension two, because I would love to do a video, but I only really like the editing, and also I wouldn't have a clue how that dandruff man got it off the computer and on to a CD, a CD which doesn't work in 90% of DVD players.. Hmm so that would be a slight problem!! Anyway now I have been told that I should go and read the syllabus, but I mean really, who would want to do something as stupid and utterly boring as that.. Maybe I can bribe Steph into reading it for me?! I doubt it but it's worth a try, and hey if she can read Jane Eyre without dying of boredom, surely a syllabus would be simple?

Oooh got to fill in forms.. hang on a sec.. I'm also attempting to play Minesweeper Flags with Wilson, she isn't so easy to beat!!! Damn she ended up beating me.. Damn evil smelly person!

Well yesterday after I wrote on this I went for a walk.. just up arcadia road, to fagans road (i think that's what it's called) and I found out that copperbella stud is up there, never knew that!! But I suppose I do now, wonder if they want any work done? Haha probably not, they most likely have about 10 grooms, with how big their place is, and how famous it is.. (well in the horse industry they are famous!)

OK well it's now 8:45 and I'm still writing this, so I think I'm just going to stop now!!! Tata!!!

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Well that song seems quite appropriate after the weekend I had, and the way I'm still feeling at the moment... To sum both up in one word...
Shit.
Yup that's the one... but wait, just in case you don't know which song I'm on about, here are the words:
Smile, though your heart is aching.
Smile, even though it's breaking.
When there are clouds in the sky, you get by if you smile.
Through your fears and sorrow, smile.
And maybe tomorrow you'll see the sun come shining through for you.
Light up your face with gladness.
Hide every trace of sadness, although a tear may be ever so near.
That's the time you must keep trying.
Smile, whats the use of crying
You'll find that life is still worthwhile, if u just smile.
That's the time you must keep on trying.
Smile, what's the use of crying.
You'll find that life is still worthwhile, if you just smile.
Smile.
Just smile.
So yeah, I never really thought about that song much before, but it really is a big act... It's like on the weekend, and during this week, when you feel like shit, but hey there is no real point telling people about it, or even commenting, so you just try and act like you are tired or something and that's why you are acting weird.. I haven't quite managed the whole smiling thing, but I think the tired approach works well enough anyway. I know I'm contradicting myself by saying "there's no point telling people about it" and then writing it on here, but I suppose if I write it down it will get rid of the whole "oh I'm so sad and nobody cares" thing, which has been annoying me, cause I hate people who act like that and now I am! Grrrr..

I hate when you hope that something will never happen to you, or that you will never feel/be like that, and then after a little while you realize you are like that.. I think I do that a lot, I sort of say "oh I never want to act like that person" and then a couple of weeks later I catch myself doing it.. I know it's hypocritical in a way, but in another way it's not... Are you only hypocritical if you criticise someone about something, then do it... or can you be hypocritical if you see someone doing something and hope that you will never do that, then you do? If the latter is also being hypocritical then I must be the hypocrit of the century.. I don't know!

I have always said that if you don't aim high you will never be dissapointed, but I've never believed it.. I've always made myself aim high, because I DON'T want to be just an ordinary person... I see what my parents are like, and my mum is saying about how she's reached the point where you think "shit is this all there is?".. I never want to be saying that, I never want to have regrets.. I suppose that saying of I want to reach my goals or die trying seems quite appropriate.. The only problem is that people also say that the highs come with the lows, the bigger the highs the bigger the lows, and I won't complain about having a crap life, or that I'm in anyway badly off.. It's just I have the natural trait of human jealousy, and when I'm competing (cause that is what I'm mainly talking about here, not school or something stupid like that) I see people who don't seem to get the lows.. It might be my imagination, but this year just seems to feel like a big low, in some ways it has been great, but when I was thinking about the general pattern it just seems to be a low... I know it's stupid to say that other people don't get the lows, I'm sure they do, I just don't see them.. everyone else sees my lows, for example this weekend..

I suppose the other thing I have to say is how much people have to learn to appreciate their friends and anyone who helps them.. "don't it always seem to go, that you don't know what you've got till it's gone?" springs to mind... I have spent about 18 months relying on a certain person always being there for me, they have never let me down, and yet this weekend they couldn't help me.. i think that's what made me feel like i had crashed to rock-bottom, not any of the other stuff that was going on... I also owe a huge thankyou to some people who helped, I didn't realize how much until I got home, and now I feel like crap for not thanking them.. It's just they still couldn't help as much as Gendy, I swear I just needed her.. I'm not saying she is slack, she couldn't help, and I understand that.. I just felt soooo lonely and stuck and had no idea what to do and just wanted to curl up and cry my heart out... but i didn't, and in a way I'm glad, because that is just stupid, and in a way im not glad because I still feel like shit now, when if i had just curled up i would probably feel ok by now.

OK this is just a whole lot of mopey crap.. so there is no point continuing, cause now it just sounds like I'm an attension seeking freak.. so tata and sorry for all the rambling! Just learn to be grateful for your friends, and the people who help you, cause one day they might not and you will feel like shit too!

Oh and sorry about all the "shit"s... :)